I’ve had two baseball dreams in my life. Both were prophetic and both required a cleansing of oneself in order to get to the next chapter in my life. According to most dream dictionaries baseball represents contentment and peace of mind. Taking showers or using the bathroom meant washing away/releasing burdens so that you could be renewed with a new sense of self and a clearer vision.
The first dream I was at a minor league game unsure of my future. I was sitting in the stands in the dark with my family unable to see what was ahead of me. I failed at being a journalist like Oprah and didn’t know what else was out there for my life. Although I was not content or at peace with it, I settled in the stands with my family trying to get comfortable and complacent with my failures. But then, with great urgency(needing to pee), I ran to the restroom to release myself of my failures. There I met and talked to my subconscious who in turn told me to try again, but this time walking in my own path, not Oprah’s.
The second dream I’d finally made it to the major leagues, sitting in the director’s chair. Taking a shower in my office, I had to once again cleanse myself of my failures from the previous said journey to now becoming an entrepreneur. I washed off my burdens so that I can finally sit in my director’s chair with no doubts or fears that I am supposed to be there.
On this entrepreneurial journey I’ve lost a lot along the way. I’ve lost my favorite aunt, my best friend, last year. May she rest in peace. I’ve grown apart one way or another from all of my closest friends. I’ve lost jobs and the large income that came with it. I even lost support from loved ones who sees this long entrepreneurial journey as a mistake because of the lack of evidence of success. I’ve carried the weight of all of these things and placed them on my shoulders, letting it weigh down on me. I was like that guy in the Let Go commercial who wouldn’t let go of his favorite beer tap machine even though it was making him sink faster into the quicksand.
The elevation process is a painful one. You don’t get to take your bag of burdens (past things and people) with you. With each new step something must be released in order for you to move forward. Sometimes you may go back and pick up that same old thing thinking it can comfort you in your elevation. But, eventually it will weigh you down as it did before and you have to let it go.
I woke up one morning and decided that I deserved to be in the director’s chair. I paid my dues and now I belong in this chair. The cleansing needed to happen in order for me to elevate and grow and become the woman God meant for me to be. It was time I sit confidently in my well earned director’s chair without any reservations. It’s time to take my seat at the head of the table.